I need to be reminded of this.

I came across this quote a couple years ago while reading Richard Foster's Money, Sex, and Power. I re-discovered it today. It's still true.

Discussions of stewardship, almost without exception, view money as completely neutral and depersonalized. It is merely "a medium of exchange," as we say. God has given us money to use, to administer, to put into service, goes the teaching. And so the emphasis is always placed upon the best use, the proper stewardship, of the resources God has entrusted to us.

What all this talk about stewardship fails to see is that money is not just a neutral medium of exchange but a "power" with a life of its own. And very often it is a "power" that is demonic in character. As long as we think of money in impersonal terms alone, no moral problems exist aside from the proper use of it. But when we begin to take seriously the biblical perspective that money is animated and energized by "powers," then our relationship to money is filled with moral consequence....

... When Jesus uses the Aramaic term mammon to refer to wealth, he is giving it a personal and spiritual character. When he declares, "You cannot serve God and mammon" (Matt. 6:24), he is personifying mammon as a rival god. In saying this, Jesus is making it unmistakably clear that money is not some impersonal medium of exchange. Money is not something that is morally neutral, a resource to be used in good or bad ways depending solely upon our attitude toward it. Mammon is a power that seeks to dominate us

When the Bible refers to money as a power, it does not mean something vague or impersonal. Nor does it mean power in the sense we mean when we speak, for example, of "purchasing power." No, according to Jesus and all the writers of the New Testament, behind money are very real spiritual forces that energize it and give it a life of its own. Hence, money is an active agent; it is a law unto itself; and it is capable of inspiring devotion.....

... [T]he thing I failed to see, and the thing that Jesus saw so clearly, is the way in which mammon makes a bid for our hearts. Mammon asks for our allegiance in a way that sucks the milk of human kindness out of our very being.

Now we are playing a waiting game. We rescued the van from the evil clutches of Canadian Tire (on Confederation Drive; don't ever go there... well, to the service department anyway), and now it is getting fixed for a fraction of the price by a small garage close to here. At some point I am going to have to sit down and log how many things have gone wrong so far, just for your entertainment. But for now, I shall accentuate the positive. The van will be an easy fix and we will depart Saskatoon early this afternoon and arrive in Yorkton with perfect timing. Nothing more will go wrong, and everyone will pay us double what we have been expecting....................


I had coffee today with Jordon Cooper. Good guy, and we had a good chat about family and church life, Canadian politics, and the blogging world. I was a little cynical at first, but I really have found the conversations and relationships of blogland to be be quite valuable. Cyber-space can only grant community to a certain level, but it plays its part in messing with my head.

That's a good thing.
I can't credit this one because I can't remember where I saw it, but somewhere I saw a shirt that said:

They will know we are Christians by our t-shirts

I want one of those.


Is there some kind of record for longest blog entries ever??
Well, there is some good news and some bad news. Bad news first...

We are stuck in Saskatoon because the van broke down and is being held hostage in Canadian Tire. They want $800 bucks to fix it and they are very non-committal and how soon they can get it done. I hate hate hate Canadian Tire. "With a pure and perfect hatred" as King David would say. So we are scrambling around trying to find an honest mechanic who will charge an honest price. On the other hand, the concerts have been going very well, and we are staying with very generous people who are letting us stay a little longer while things get worked out, but the pressure is building once again. We have to be in Yorkton on Thursday, so this fix job has to get done. Sheesh.


Well, we're gone for a bit to Saskatchewan. Here comes my crash course in touring. I will check in here whenever I can track down an internet connection. It starts in Saskatoon, and ends off in Regina, where I am sticking around to watch the Labour Day Classic. Let the adventure begin.
Kewl! Another new blogger joins the blogosphere, and this one with a global flavour. I spent some time at a college in Lithuania where I met this very good guy, Simon Kiela. He and his wife were in Winnipeg for quite a while going to school, but now they are back in the port city of Klaipeda, a beautiful spot on the Baltic sea, and perhaps one of the best memories of my life. Simon pastors a church that was begun by some of the students at the college there. Give him a read. He will be an interesting window into life in Eastern Europe.


All these concerts are a lot of fun, but I do feel a little like I am starting over again. There is quite a big difference between leading worship in a Sunday-morning setting, and doing a more performance oriented concert (well, in some ways it is different; in others quite similar...).

I remember the first morning I ever led in our church. I was pretty green and nervous, but I was backed by my good friend Brian, an experienced drummer. At one point in the set I had been playing a song for a while, when I looked across the stage to see Brian mouthing the words, "You suck!" I was already feeling bad enough about myself and couldn't belive he was adding this to it. I mouthed back, "What??" Him again, "You suck..." pointing at me with his drums sticks, "YOU SUCK!" I was getting a little steamed thinking this was really not the time and not very funny at all until he finally said it out loud, and it all made sense, "NEW SONG!!"


The last couple of posts get me thinking about the whole works/faith debate that has characterized so much of modern Christianity. I grew up with Ephesians 2:8-9 always in the forefront of my field of vision. So it was a great shock to me when I was later introduced to problematic references like James 2:24. It seemed to stand in stark opposition to the bedrock principle of Eph. 2:8-9. And watching Evangelicals do backflips to try to make the passage go away always left me unconvinced. I mean it is telling how problematic the text is when Martin Luther, the godfather of Sola Fide, so disliked the book of James that he desired to see this "gospel of straw" removed from the Bible. But more problematic texts present themselves (Romans: 2:5-8; Matthew 25: 31-46) , and the least you can do is face the issue. The authors of the New Testment seemed to have no discomfort in reconciling statements like the above with ones that said "faith in Jesus is the way to salvation".

So here's where they reconcile in my head. It is interesting to me that, contrary to what I always used to parrot, Eph. 2:8-9 says we are saved, not by faith, but by grace through faith. And as I look up the word grace, I see it defined as the "loving kindness of God". And that is what I think brings salvation to us, when we join in with the loving-kindness of God. You might say we are saved by Love. Because you can't have the "Christ-kind" of Love without faith; it just turns into chore-like duty. And you can't have Love without works; any spouse who has heard a partner say "I love you" yet never act it out understands this well.

Jesus was very deliberate about revealing to us a new way of Loving - the way of grace. He pointed out the only way to join in was a re-birthing of your heart into Love - it can't be undertaken without a change by the Spirit. Faith in him is faith in the Love he showed us at the cross, a culmination of the way of Love he revealed during his life.

Anyway, this is taking a whole lot longer than I expected. I'd better take some time to deal with it a little more comprehensively somewhere else. Too much brain power to expend while my boy is yelling for orange juice...


More from the Volf article (wow, he sounds like Soren K. here):

I asked whether a fruitful theological discussion is difficult with those who aren't committed to the authority of Scripture. "I don't feel that at all," he replied. "I think there are people who affirm the most strict understanding of scriptural authority but find zillions of ways of transgressing theologically and personally against it. The question of authority is important, but the central question is how the Bible functions in theology and life. I think evangelicals would do better if they concentrated less on bolstering the formal authority of the Scripture�which I certainly would want to affirm�and more on displaying how biblical texts can shape lives in salutary ways, how they are fruitful texts, how they are texts one can live according to. I think that would do more to establish the authority of Scripture than the formal assertion of the authority of Scripture."
From an article about Miroslav Volf:

Volf says, "I don't do systematic theology which then gets to be applied. I saw immediately that I couldn't explicate the theological content of forgiveness without engaging the social practice of it. It's the same with the doctrine of God. I don't talk about it in abstraction from how the presence and activity of God impinges on the way you live your life."

There is something very right when a theologian is vigilant about marrying his theory to his practice.
I just got back from the concert. What an encouraging start. It was in an old barn, fixed up for such events, and the weather was perfect. The response was good and Kim's baby even made it happily to almost the end. Kim had to finish up the concert with Iryn sitting on her lap, but I think people loved that too. Was pretty cute.

Well, tonight is the first concert, and I think we are ready. I'm excited about it anyway. We still don't have a van, but it looks like Craig will drive 20 hours (one way!) across this absurdly-sized country to get their van which is getting fixed in B.C. He should be back in time for the start of the Saskatchewan tour. I am spending the afternoon burning mini-CD's to sell at the concert.

I spent the morning getting my classroom ready for classes as I still will be teaching two days a week. I missed that place. And the thought of teaching about ancient Egypt yet again actually gets me jazzed. The video of the modern-day mummification (brain out through the nose, etc) is only two weeks away. Right on!


This is from my friend Chris Nickols. He's thinking hard on the subject of church and culture...

...I'm going for the need to be "plugged in" to a community but I feel like going to church to find community is like going to single's bar to pick up a chick. Am I going to actually find a chick? maybe... but am I really even going to be able to connect with a chick that I'd find at a place like this? You get the idea. Every month or so Jenn and I get this idea that we need to start going to church to meet some people. We get the kids all ready, we head out only to find a spot way too far away from the church. We walk (slowly as we've got a 3 year old), we get a spot to sit down and worry if the kids are going to be OK in childrens church... but I always know in the back of my mind that Michael's number or name is going to flash up on the come get your screamin kid screen. The worship is... well worship. The message is usually painfully boring, but sometimes, oh sometimes, on rare occasion, it's... average. It's over, I smile and shake hands with person beside me or whoever's in hand shaking distance. We load the kids back up, come home and I realize again why I had stopped going to church in the first place. Even Jesus in a parable wanted a return on His investment. I've just spent my whole evening (or morning for you moderns) working hard to be involved in something that doesn't even excite me or challenge me or encourage me or anything. I think a lot of it has to do with my philosophy of OPTIONS. Too many options equal very little substance. Education, affluence, money, power, sex, everything has us keeping our options open and striving to open our options. America is the LAND of opportunities (options), you can have the American dream and your options are endless. When it comes to community, commitment equals limiting ones options. It's the fear that keeps men single and friendships shallow. The poor have an amazing thing to give to us in this. Their survival depends on a close knit community, and although their lifestyles are destructive, their lack of options are a great cure to individualism...

See, the Japanese love to have English writing on their shirts, and they don't care what it says. Can you imagine how much fun the makers of these shirts are having?

I know I have talked about it before, but I found this at engrish.com.


Well, we just ha the first annual blogger's bar-b-q at our place tonight. Jason and Yvonne, Odia, and her husband Larry. Leila couldn't make it and I'm feeling dumb that I forgot to invite Joy and Derek, but it was a surprise to see them in the city anyway. Eventually we will make it into a massive, global, roaming, yearly festival of some sort. Right? Who's coming?


The pictures of the Bishop's boy are looking so good that it inspired me to scan in some Simon shots. But you have to open up the photo album to see them (look under Simon... 1 year to a year and a half)
From an interesting article via Jordon Cooper:

Of these 100 most popular Christian books, only four are about Christ.

That's gotta say something about our North American brand of Christianity.


From the Good news / bad news file: The van is still busted and sitting in a shop in BC, but maybe a long drive next week might get it back here in time. On the good side, Merciful God has been getting some radio play on CHVN. Mustn't be in the high rotation bin, because I can never catch it, but friends have phoned me to say they heard it. And apparently CJOA in Thunder Bay and Spirit FM in Lethbridge are playing Love Like This.
And on the lighter side, Joy tells funny stories...
I am shaken by the courage of these guys. They basically go to areas of the world where conflict and violence is going on and "get in the way". People who are being beaten down and oppressed suddenly have a much louder voice when a bunch of North Americans, who the media tends to pay more attention to, go and get involved. Next time you hear somebody call a pacifist a coward, you might think of these guys.

�Over the past 450 years of martyrdom, immigration and missionary proclamation, the God of shalom has been preparing us Anabaptists for a late twentieth-century rendevous with history. The next twenty years will be the most dangerous - and perhaps the most vicious and violent - in human history. If we are ready to embrace the cross, God�s reconciling people will profoundly impact the course of world history . . . This could be our finest hour. Never has the world needed our message more. Never has it been more open. Now is the time to risk everything for our belief that Jesus is the way to peace. If we still believe it, now is the time to live what we have spoken.

�We must take up our cross and follow Jesus to Golgotha. We must be prepared to die by the thousands. Those who believed in peace through the sword have not hesitated to die. Proudly, courageously, they gave their lives. Again and again, they sacrificed bright futures to the tragic illusion that one more righteous crusade would bring peace in their time, and they laid down their lives by the millions.

�Unless we . . . are ready to start to die by the thousands in dramatic vigorous new exploits for peace and justice, we should sadly confess that we never really meant what we said, and we dare never whisper another word about pacifism to our sisters and brothers in those desperate lands filled with injustice. Unless we are ready to die developing new nonviolent attempts to reduce conflict, we should confess that we never really meant that the cross was an alternative to the sword . . . �


I read somewhere that in life each of us is striving every which way to return to the joy we knew as children. Having a kid makes that statement real. I just watched my one and a half year old eat his supper. I stood about ten feet away and just left him alone in his own little world. And who knew eating spaghetti and meat sauce could be so much fun. By the end it absolutely everywhere - on him, the chair, the table, the floor - but so much fun had been had. And for me, pure entertainment. All the laughs I need for today.
Through Rudy Carrasco's blog, I found these guys, The Simple Way. And it looks like they are up to some good stuff.


Phillip Yancey calls like he sees it.
...the Missionaries told them that everything they had ever heard from God, everything that they had ever done to worship God, and in fact everything that God had made of their identity, was evil. They decided that instead of studying the culture and finding out what was good and right, and what was questionable, they would make a blanket statement that everything was ungodly. This legacy holds true today on our �Christian� reserve, even to the point where some parents have told the schools that they don�t even want their children hearing Cree, �cause it�s evil.

From Derek Eidse way up in Norway House. What amazes me is that the people would actually go for it. You make me ponder hard questions, Derek.

Here's a map of Manitoba. Can you find Norway House 9look in the middle)? Some of you might need this map of Canada. Can you find Manitoba (middle again)?

...hmmm and just in case, here's a map of North America. Can you find Canada (look up, waaay up)?


Challenging and important words from Todd Hunter (via CVN blog):

The effects of living in a wrong story are devastating to our churches. Countless thousands of well�intentioned pastors are left to try to disciple people who have no intention of ever seriously following Jesus or practicing their religion. The church is in serious trouble when discipleship (apprenticeship to Jesus) is viewed as extracurricular or optional.
Oh no. Kim's van broke down, which jeopardizes our tour in two weeks. I know Yvonne asked for a dehumidifier on her blog and someone came through. Littlebear, have you got a van you aren't using for a while? A large skateboard? Any multi-billionaires out there who want to sponsor a tour? I'll paint your name on the side of the van!!?!


On snake-handling Pentecostals:

In the early days of the movement, the bitten were shunned�the person was considered to be "in sin" or lacked sufficient faith. Today most adherents believe even the devout will be bitten occasionally.

Good to see that rigid legalism is losing it's grip.
Here is a community of faith right here in Winnipeg committed to inner city community development in the West End neighborhood. Here is some inspiration I found at their website:

Go to the people
Live among them
Learn from them
Love them
Start with what they know
Build on what they have:
But of the best leaders
When their task is done
The people will remark
"We have done it ourselves."


We did a gig tonight that consisted almost entirely of cover songs, entertaining the baseball fans as they entered the stadium. Good times. Sweet Caroline is the karoke can't-get-it-out-of-my-head song of the century. And Beatles songs. Lotsa Beatles songs.

Speaking of the Beatles, I noticed a play on the way home called Bigger Than Jesus. I was ripped off because I had thought that would be a good name for a Christian rock band. I figured we would do like Stryper and always have a scripture reference right under the name. John 14:12. You know, the one about us doing greater works than Jesus because he is going to the father.

Nah, probably wouldn't go over.
Finally Flanders is getting some respect. It's been a long time coming, but now he gets his own evening at Greenbelt. Show me a better a example of selflesness gone nuts than Ned... you'll be searching a long time.
Tonight is the Bigbreak concert at the Pantages Theatre. The best indie music in Winnipeg on stage for CBC TV. We got tickets because I am somewhat infatuated with the band Nathan, a local Sargeant-Pepper-meets-country-folk quartet. Their lead singer has one of those little-girl angel voices that you either seem to really love or really hate. I really love it.
American adventurer Steve Fossett (R) and Perlan Project team leader Einar Enevoldson walk off the Omarama air field after their failed attempt at the world gliding altitude record from their Omarama workshop, August 10, 2002. The Perlan Project aim is to take a German DG505 glider past the existing record of 14,938m (48,996 feet), through severe turbulence and extreme temperatures to 18,288m (60,000 feet). The pair will make another attempt at the altitude record on Sunday. REUTERS/Simon Baker

Is this a sign of the incredible boredom of a rich and fat society? If you are going to risk your life to give it some meaning, aren't there a whole lot better things to risk your life for?


I know I might be beating this one to death (I think I've blogged about it at least twice before) but may I again shout and holler about how much I love the song Holy War by Andrew Smith. It's like an anthem for anyone who has become weary of and departed from all the dictates and commands of illegimate institutional control ( I know, that's vague... so is the song).

Holy War

You�ve all drunk the depths of spiritual pleasure
You�ve all become addicted to the song of ghosts
You get so easily waylaid by the sirens and the weather
And all those things that you fear the most

Yeah, we are the ghosts within your machine
Within the fog of our ambition
Searching for a language of the soul
Much more so than any unifying creed or militant message
And we�re hard to hold, like fog people
As we search for a reason to waste our lives

I don�t want to fight in your Holy War
How can I defend myself anymore?
I don�t want to live in your us and them world
God knows there is only us

You say we stumble like the damned trying to touch it and I know
I know we stammer like fools
Struggling to articulate the inexpressible wonder
All the beauty in this broken mirror
These are the signs, and these are the pains of the hunger
The very mark of our ascendancy
As we rise to that table, to that feast prepared
For the least of these fog people
Tasting a reason to waste our lives
From the Grand Epiphanies file:

I just realized something as I finished off my cereal. I love Life cereal and I love Cheerios. They are both made of the same thing. Do you know what it is? Oats. I must have the soul of horse.

I mean I really love them. I just finished lunch. Two bowls of Life and a bowl of Cheerios. Mmmmmmmm. Oats...


New blog announcement! My good friends, Derek and Joy Eidse have just started up their own. And it going to be interesting, as they live a non-run-of-the-mill sort of life. They are teaching WAY up north, about 10 hours drive north of Winnipeg in Norway House on a reservation there (and you all thought Winnipeg was far north!!). Definitely cross-cultural. They are those kind of people who leave you feeling very inspired as they are very deliberate about stripping away the religious extras to find out what a life lived for Christ really means. So they are up there finding out. Should be a good read.


Thw following is a passage from The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky. The first time I read it I had to stop, ponder, and read it a number of times over. It is a remarkable re-viewing of hell, not as a place you get sent to, but one that you condemn yourself to by squandering the opportunity given to you in life to love. What if we are so free that even on the other side of death perfect Love still invites us to come, but our own guilt over a wasted life keeps us apart?

Fathers and teachers, I ponder, "What is hell?" I maintain that it is the suffering of being unable to love. Once in infinite existence, immeasurable in time and space, a spiritual creature was given on his coming to earth the power of saying, "I am and I love." Once, only once, there was given him a moment of active lifting love, and for that was earthly life given him, and with it times and seasons. And that happy creature rejected the priceless gift, prized it and loved it not, scorned it and remained callous. Such a one, having left the earth, sees Abraham's bosom and talks with Abraham as we are told in the parable of the rich man and Lazarus, and beholds heaven and can go up to the Lord. But that is just his torment, to rise up to the Lord without ever having loved, to be brought close to those who have loved when he has despised their love. For he sees clearly and says to himself, "Now I have understanding, and though I now thirst to love, there will be nothing great, no sacrifice in my love, for my earthly life is over, and Abraham will not come even with a drop of living water (that is the gift of earthly active life) to cool the fiery thirst of spiritual love which burns in me now, though I despised it on earth; there is no more life for me and will be no more time! Even though I would gladly give my life for others, it can never be, for that life is passed which can be sacrificed for love, and now there is a gulf fixed between that life and this existence."


More from the snarky ones. They just find such great stuff...
How Canadian is this!!! From the goofy folks at snarky malarkey.
I like how Littlebear says things:

They look at me from under furrowed brows and frown as they continue past, hollering to one another in low german. It makes me long for the children of africa, with their black faces and white smiles. They will never withold a smile from you, not as long as they know how to do it. I miss their ragged loose fitting pants and the worn shirts that hang off their skinny shoulders. I've never seen children as beautiful as those.

I further wonder about the opinions of others as I wander the streets of this clean and quiet town. It seems so silly to spend even a moment bothering with the subjective, perspective based opinion of another. People are fickle and have short memories. They are ever changing, ever growing, and how they feel will change tomorrow.

I pass a house, the only one on the street, with chipped paint and a cracked foundation. An old airconditioner hangs out a front window and the car that sits on the driveway is on it's last leg. People might think that these people are poor.

"Blessed are the poor, for theirs is the kingdom of God"

I pass a yard that's unkept, strewn with broken toys and forgotten tools. The grass is long and weeds creep up the side of the house. People might think that these people are messy

Better an unkept yard than a white-washed tomb.

Don't you think?
Well, we took my sister to the airport this morning. She is off to Japan, and I am jealous. Now four of our closest buddies from here are living over there, looking to see what it means to build a community of faith in the Japanese context. I would like to go too, but the time is not right... I've got to give this music thing a go. Also this week, good friends of mine are heading way back up north to their home in Norway House where they are teachers. It would be nice to have everyone together here for a while, but there is something awesome about everyone going off to pursue these cross-cultural dreams.

So it kept me thinking today of the importance of cross-cultural experiences when it comes to the Kingdom of God. I remember hearing something challenging once from Jackie Pullinger. She was saying that we shouldn't listen to the voices that say the best and most effective way to do missions is to train nationals in their own countries and then leave them to do it for themselves. It sounds good at first, but is really a severe reaction to the culturally arrogant and colonial notions of mission that characterized most of the evangelical missions movment. Instead, she offered that we should embrace a model that reflects the diversity that God seems to so love. She pointed out how just as Christ left his culture, the culture of heaven, to incarnate amongst us his message of Love, so something good happens when we step out of our own culture and incarnate his Way in another place. There is something about being outside of our comfort zone that brings clarity to our mission as a people of God. It is not so easy to just to blend in and forget that we live for something beyond our culture.

The difference from the old way, though, is that this cross-cultural experience happen in every direction - not just from the "Christian" Western country to poor "pagan" country. We are dreaming of a globally diverse community of faith wherein sometimes a "missionary" from here goes to Japan, and sometimes a missionary from Japan goes to India, and then one of those missionaries from India comes here to teach us. I guess that is the main switch in mentality - no longer do we go just to bring the "Truth" to those who don't have it. Instead, we go to bring the truth God has revealed to us, and to learn the truth God has given to them.

I can get excited when I think of how that could affect my area here in the inner city. Natusmi, our friend from Japan, lived here for a couple of years and built some good friendships with some of the kids on our street. She's gone back now, but sometimes we float the idea past those kids of , "Maybe you should go to Japan one day..." Their responses reflect a kind of hopelessnes that tells them they will never get any farther than Main Street. As they see it, their only option is to stay in the North End. I can imagine how redemptive and transformational a trip to Japan would be for them. In my own life, even a short time in Lithuania changed how I viewed the mission of my life and what I was capable of. I am sure it would have some life changing effects for them as well.

But easy now... I am good at getting to far ahead of myself. God, integrate your people all over the earth.
Wisdom from Eddie Izzard...


I am moved (and a little haunted) by this parable I have been reading and re-reading in the last little while. It's from Matthew 20, the one about the owner of the vineyard giving the same pay to those who work all day as those who come near the end of the day.

I guess what strikes me is the response that God wants from us. The selfish response is, "Hey, I worked more, I should get more money than those other guys". The response, so foreign to us, that God is looking for is more like "Wow. What look at that grace and kindness. He gave them full pay even when they didn't deserve it! I want to be like that."

We want "justice", but God is demonstrating mercy.

I have real trouble at times rejoicing in good things that happen to others when it appears to be at my expense. But I am so quick to forget all the kindness and goodness God has shown me. It's such a long journey learning the rhythms and nuances of unconditional Love, me with this nasty me-first nature.

But I have to admit, it's getting better. It's a little better all the time.


I thought this was interesting too...

"If you deal with this material you can't put God on. I thought I could spread light and I could enlighten my world and those around me and I could take the Bodhisattva path, which is the path of service, of help to others. I thought I could, but I was unable to. This is a landscape in which men far stronger than you, far braver, nobler, kinder, more generous, men of extremely high achievements have burnt to a crisp on this road. Once you start dealing with sacred material you're gonna get creamed."

Leonard Cohen, L.A. Style, 1988
Wow. Leonard Cohen says it well. From his website bio.

"What is a saint? A saint is someone who has achieved a remote human possibility. It is impossible to say what that possibility is. I think that it has something to do with the energy of love. Contact with this energy results in the exercise of a kind of balance in the chaos of existence. A saint does not dissolve the chaos; if he did the world would have changed long ago. I do not think that a saint dissolves the chaos even for himself, for there is something arrogant and warlike in the notion of a man setting the universe in order. It is a kind of balance that is his glory. He rides the drifts like an escaped ski. His course is the caress of the hill. His track is a drawing of the snow in a moment of its particular arrangement with wind and rock. Something in him so loves the world that he gives himself to the laws of gravity and chance. Far from flying with angels, he traces with the fidelity of a seismograph needle the state of the solid bloody landscape. His house is dangerous and finite, but he is at home in the world. He can love the shape of human beings, the fine and twisted shapes of the heart. It is good to have among us such men, such balancing monsters of love."
Paul Fromont points me to this interview with Mike Riddell. Man, I like that guy. Read his book Threshold of the Future. It was one of those life-shapers for me.


In the land of mirrors with fuzzy-dices
I'm waiting through your mid-life crisis
But we all want something new
Fountains found in fads and trends
Are wading pools that you pretend
Can really satisfy you
I was told that my site has been down for the last couple days. I have no idea why that was, being of limited cyber-knowledge, but I think it is up now. At least it is when I try. I hope it is for you too. If you can't see this, don't email me...